just because you're
stuck
in a cave
doesn't mean
you
can't see
the light shining
on the walls
and even better
is when
you
begin to
believe in the light
and trust it enough
to
let it
lead
you
to the wonders
beyond
About Me
- alia
- "too much stuff, too many places, too much information, too many people, too much of things for there to be too much of, there is too much to know and i don't know where to begin but i want to try."
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Friday, October 18, 2013
general frustrations
why do i waste
time
energy
feelings
on people?
when people don't waste any
time
energy
feelings
even pretending to care.
i guess it comes down to
the fact
that no one understands
or
wants to understand.
maybe i expect too much,
but i wake up alone
go to sleep alone
and in between
i'm alone.
people go about their lives
while my world is
crumbling.
i can't blame anyone for living
but i wonder:
why do i bother
living?
time
energy
feelings
on people?
when people don't waste any
time
energy
feelings
even pretending to care.
i guess it comes down to
the fact
that no one understands
or
wants to understand.
maybe i expect too much,
but i wake up alone
go to sleep alone
and in between
i'm alone.
people go about their lives
while my world is
crumbling.
i can't blame anyone for living
but i wonder:
why do i bother
living?
Thursday, October 17, 2013
leftovers
sometimes
leftovers are good
when you're feeling lazy
or you've had a busy day
but right now
i can only think about
having no one
to feed
leftovers are good
when you're feeling lazy
or you've had a busy day
but right now
i can only think about
having no one
to feed
Thursday, October 10, 2013
soup existence
cooking alone and
eating alone
i wanted to cry
but the onion beat me to it
tears without emotion
without thought
without the weight
of your body
laying on my memory
fading between
the good and bad
swirling
until it all becomes
one in the bowl
losing myself in the warmth
my burnt tongue
matches the burn
left on my heart
raw and regretting
the moment i began to care
eating alone
i wanted to cry
but the onion beat me to it
tears without emotion
without thought
without the weight
of your body
laying on my memory
fading between
the good and bad
swirling
until it all becomes
one in the bowl
losing myself in the warmth
my burnt tongue
matches the burn
left on my heart
raw and regretting
the moment i began to care
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
a spotless mind?
in so many states
like joel and clem
but i hope you don't erase me
from your memory
perhaps it's better if you do
perhaps it's better if i do
instead of thinking about how
we're in too many states
with
too many miles
separating us time
and time again
feeling the same
echo pull
my soul to yours
not sure how to stop
these dreams and desires
not sure if i want to
stop the chaotic lust
drinking about you
filling empty nights
filling empty thoughts
hoping they weren't
empty memories
empty now lying awake
dreaming of the way
you used to fill me
with your affection, your body,
your time now so
separate from mine
and i wonder if
there will be a time
when we exist
as something again
lately it has been a lot of nostalgia and wishful thinking. i miss her terribly.
like joel and clem
but i hope you don't erase me
from your memory
perhaps it's better if you do
perhaps it's better if i do
instead of thinking about how
we're in too many states
with
too many miles
separating us time
and time again
feeling the same
echo pull
my soul to yours
not sure how to stop
these dreams and desires
not sure if i want to
stop the chaotic lust
drinking about you
filling empty nights
filling empty thoughts
hoping they weren't
empty memories
empty now lying awake
dreaming of the way
you used to fill me
with your affection, your body,
your time now so
separate from mine
and i wonder if
there will be a time
when we exist
as something again
lately it has been a lot of nostalgia and wishful thinking. i miss her terribly.
Monday, October 7, 2013
music
listening to the music you suggested
and i feel better
but i also feel worse
thinking about the possibility of
you sitting in your room
thousands of miles away
listening to these same songs
when not long ago you were
here next to me
listening to songs
feeling songs
feeling our song consume us
and trap us in a trance
dancing delight devouring us
delusional playing
with each other's hearts
the cacophony a harmonic orchestra
in my head
lovely music
and i feel better
but i also feel worse
thinking about the possibility of
you sitting in your room
thousands of miles away
listening to these same songs
when not long ago you were
here next to me
listening to songs
feeling songs
feeling our song consume us
and trap us in a trance
dancing delight devouring us
delusional playing
with each other's hearts
the cacophony a harmonic orchestra
in my head
lovely music
forget
i am forgetting
what it's like to
sleep
forgetting
what it's like to
feel
but as hard as i try
i can't forget
how your body used to press against mine
providing warmth on cold nights
warmth when my soul got chilly
your presence
soothing like a cup of tea
i won't forget
waking up to those blue eyes every morning
feeling like the luckiest girl in the world
i'm starting to think that
i'll never forget
the way
your words
hit me like a drop of honey
sweet on my tongue
down to the bottom of my memory
but i am forgetting
what it was like
when you weren't
in my life
and i am forgetting
how to live
without you
here
what it's like to
sleep
forgetting
what it's like to
feel
but as hard as i try
i can't forget
how your body used to press against mine
providing warmth on cold nights
warmth when my soul got chilly
your presence
soothing like a cup of tea
i won't forget
waking up to those blue eyes every morning
feeling like the luckiest girl in the world
i'm starting to think that
i'll never forget
the way
your words
hit me like a drop of honey
sweet on my tongue
down to the bottom of my memory
but i am forgetting
what it was like
when you weren't
in my life
and i am forgetting
how to live
without you
here
Saturday, October 5, 2013
Friday, October 4, 2013
Thursday, October 3, 2013
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