melting, pieces

watch as i melt before you, dripping and thin, ruining your carpet
maintained and vacuumed and ready to battle life's hardships
prepared and able to make a nice home
but everything i touch begins to melt
just as i did when the gods made their decision
trapped in a cage of my own making
alone because i would have it no other way
except
something, some part of my liquid being, this mess, something - a tiny hand makes its way from the center of my chest to the open world
in search of a similar being
maybe not similar, but indestructible
in the same ways
desperate
fearful
confused
in the same ways
and i search the atmosphere for a kinder world
a world that can accommodate all of my flaws and childish tendencies
a place for sadness, loneliness, a place familiar
and the worlds in the universe crash upon my every hope and dream
my paper thin soul is crushed against the waves
and i pray the red sea will save me
i've been floating long enough, my fluid blending blending
i emerge dripping, dyed, a crimson cape of lies rests upon my shoulders
i pull the hood over my eyes
try to walk as i once did, in my old body
but the sea never leaves, and i drown into the earth
consumed by the harsh architecture of a sleeping mind
my heart beats and quakes the earth that wouldn't accept me
wait for my body to return to me
with my remains claw the ground and feel dirt beneath my fingertips
in my rest search the ends of the world for a minute salvation
a restoration momentary enough to fill my existence with shining brilliant specks of truth and truth alone,
of the answers to my riddle of a life
solve the puzzle short of pieces
pieces, lost, forgotten, hidden, they're everywhere
all homeless
all stranded like the souls who walk the streets at night,
asking the same questions of the world
those who laugh in a group but hide their somber reality
alone but surrounded by the greatest marvels
the universe is meant to be explored
but now and then a poor soul will
fall into an ocean, and gasping, can't find their way to the surface
get an incurable disease
get in an accident on the road
and the universe is cruel enough to let it all happen,
it captures the weak souls,
preys on their delusions
feeds us lies
and makes us hope for things that will never happen
fluid mess in the mirror, will the melting stop